Hello Internet people!
Trying to have little relaxing Sunday after all the hubbub recently. I have been spending lots of time with baby, time around the house- trying to keep things clean & organized. A lot has happened since the last “Life Update” I published, a few months back.
First, I want to talk about the baby. Over 4 months old now & gorgeous, happy and healthy. She is such an easy baby. I am a very lucky mom. She sleeps through the night, every night from about 10pm to about 7:30am. I’m usually up just a few minutes before she is and she wakes up to my face smiling at her in her bassinet as she stretches and yawns to start her day. We change her, then she eats and plays and naps, and eats and plays and naps, and there’s usually a car ride in there somewhere, but that’s basically our day. She rarely spits up and enjoys being held by basically anyone.
Health-wise, physically, I’m doing great. Already a bit below my pre-pregnancy weight and going to the gym regularly. I gotta keep that up, because I find it really helps with my mental health. That said, I haven’t been 100% lately. In mid-December, I suffered a “mild” concussion that took 2 weeks to resolve. In that time I had headaches, chronic fatigue, brain fog, tinnitus, and major anxiety. I am very grateful to have had a lot of help from my family, but people need to work, so there was a lot of time where I had to be on my own.
I have been going to therapy 1-2 times a week to deal with my anxiety, but I told my therapist that even though we have made progress in other areas of my life, and indeed, perhaps touched on some of the deeper issues, we have not directly addressed the anxiety or how to stop it. She has suggested that I visit with someone else in her office, and is arranging an appointment for me in a couple of weeks so I may begin Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, one of the only treatments for anxiety that I’ve seen that doesn’t involve medication or something I’ve already tried like deep breathing, or redirection or distraction… Sometimes, those things work, and sometimes, they just don’t.
Another thing my therapist suggested is that I try to find time for myself, and to spend time with other people, outside my home. It’s probably a good idea. I currently spend almost all my time inside with my baby, because she needs me and I love watching her grow, but I also need to spend time outside, with friends. So, she gave me some “homework” to find a Mommy’s Day Out program, and to find some activities that my baby and I can do together in groups. I think it sounds like a lot of fun and I’m looking into these things and made a phone call earlier today. I think it may be a month or two before I really get set up on these things, since some of them have waiting lists, but I know it will be good for me in the long run. I’ll be honest though, the idea of leaving my baby with a childcare facility- even a really good one- is a little scary. I just need to get over that though. Otherwise, how will I feel when she starts school?
Something else happened, recently, and I would like to commemorate here and in my home. My dog, Rhonda, who I’ve known since I moved to Memphis, died last Sunday. She was the best dog. I had known her for 8 years, and she was almost 15 years old. I remember one time, my husband and I were having our annual Halloween party, and I had fallen asleep with a friend in my bed, and Rhonda was on the floor in front of the bed. Well, midnight came around and my friend’s boyfriend wanted to leave the party, so he came into the room to get her. Well, Rhonda, being the fabulous guard dog she was, started to growl at him, because she was protecting us. So, the boyfriend quietly left, and got my husband, so he could quell Rhonda’s protective nature, and allow him to get her. Rhonda was very kind and always wanted to sleep next to you. She was not a bed hog, and would move politely if asked to do so. She loved treats, her favorites being the largest solid bones sold at the store. She was great with kids and other pets- even cats. She could always be found near a doorway, grooming herself, and was not shy about licking you as you sat or laid on the couch. She also loved to “hold your hand,” and would always put her paw in your hand if you had it close to her at all. It was her thing. The last time I saw her, she still did it- even though, I imagine it may have pained her to lift her paw even, as she lay there. We got a paw print made, and are gonna keep it in a shadow box, in the hallway near the kitchen, where we keep other treasures.
I do also want to talk about some positive stuff going on in my life, like I said above: the weight loss journey is still being successful and I’m about half way to my goal! My baby is adorable and I am so in love with her! Plus, we did get new fish, a “breeding pair,” of clown fish and an anemone for them to play with. Some pretty cool stuff going on over here.
Anyways, there are a lot of things, emotionally, going on with me right now. And, I do want to share and talk about them. If you ever want to chat- hmu on Twitter or comment below 🙂